भारत में लड़कियों को हमेशा आंका और दोषी ठहराया जाता है। “मुझे इस तरह की लड़की पसंद नहीं है, वह लड़की गलत है”। “मेरे बेटों को फसाया”, “उसने मेरे भाई को बदल दिया”.
एक दिन घर में मेहर ने अपने कुछ ऑफिस में काम करने वाले और दोस्तो को बुलाया था। अचानक से उसकी ननद आयी और सबके सामने मेहर को भला बुरा बोलने लगी। मेहर की एक दोस्त ने आगे बढ़कर समझाने की कोशिश की तो बात और बढ़ गई।
इस बीच मेहर का पति घर आया और उसने सबकुछ अपनी आंखो से देखा। मेहर के पति आशीष ने अपनी बहन को रोकने की कोशश की तो बहन ने इल्ज़ाम लगा दिया कि भाई एक पराई लड़की का साथ दे रहा है और दूसरो के सामने अपने परिवार वाले को जलील कर रहा है।
बात इतनी बढ़ गई कि घर के दूसरे लोगो को रोकना पड़ा।
सभा बैठी सास की और सास ने अपनी बेटी को बिना सुने ही बेकसूर बता दिया।
मेहर पर इल्ज़ाम लगाते हुए बोली कि तुमको बर्दास्त कर लेना चाहिए।
कुछ दिन बाद , तलाकशुदा मौसी मिलने घर आई वत सावित्री व्रत के उपलक्ष में आते ही पहले एक व्यंग्यात्मक लहजे में टिप्पणी की अपनी बहन से “मैंने सुना है कि आपकी बहू जहाँ भी जाती है, सिंदूर लगाती है”।
उस चाची को जवाब देने का मन किया मेहर का “आप दो चुटकी सिंदूर की कीमत के बारे में क्या जानते हैं, बहुत प्यार बस्ता है इसमें।” और जो मेहर को जज करने में व्यस्त था, उसने उसे एक दर्पण देने के बारे में सोचा। यह सभी चाची और रिश्तेदारों द्वारा आरोप लगाने के लिए बहुत आसान है जो एक दुल्हन को जज करने के लिए हैं। सबसे दुखद बात यह है कि यह स्वीकार करना कि लड़की अब उनके परिवार का हिस्सा है। महिलाएं एक लड़की का स्वागत करने के बजाय एक-दूसरे से नफरत करती हैं, वे सिर्फ मानसिक रूप से परेशान करने और उसका जिना दूभर करने की योजना बनाते हैं।
क्या आपको लगता है कि मेहर को बर्दास्त कर लेना चाहिए जैसे उसकी सास ने बोला या फिर आवाज़ उठानी चाहिए।
Are you staying all alone in a city for your job and suddenly the country went to lockdown. You cannot go outside, no office, no more hanging out with friends, the whole day you spend your time playing ludo, pubg and watching shows on Netflix, Amazon prime, youtube, Hotstar, feel like you are locked up in a luxurious jail? Some might feel the same loneliness ever with their families, people all around but no-one to sit and relax, share your feelings and express.
Here’s a story:
Shweta after her marriage shifted to another city with her husband. She left her family, friends, the local places, markets, colony, society and vibes from her places which made her feel homely.
She was very excited about her new life. She was ready to explore an entirely different place and diverse culture. With her open heart, she was willing to build her own family and mould herself into a new lifestyle.
Initial days, were like a fairy tale. She arranged and decorated her new flat. Now it was her home, tried enchanting recipes, enjoyed shopping household products and loved to wait for her husband.
Everything was fine but after some time she started to miss her own self. She was a girl who had lots of close friends. A working and independent girl who had a busy lifestyle. A target to achieve and a routine to follow.
From client meetings to office gossips, talking with her colleagues or hanging out with besties she started missing all.
Suddenly, she started to feel lonely and even her husband couldn’t feel the hollowness she is dealing in her life.
A city where she knows the only person. Out of so many faces, she recognises only one. Out of so many locations, she has an apartment where she can sit and look outside. The only view, she looked every day we’re a few buildings and trees from her window.
She was feeling as if she’s trapped in a cell, she wished to be the girl she was earlier. She can open the gates of her cage but don’t know where to fly.
This is life, it’s difficult to adapt and your sacrifices won’t be acknowledged.
Shweta will adapt and get accustomed to this life one day.
This morning, I read that the US commission has raised their concerns over the way India is fighting against Coronavirus.
According to a media report, a government-running hospital in Ahmedabad has separated the infected places on the basis of religion.
On this, official Spokesperson, Ministry of External Affairs, India blasted out on USCIRF to stop adding religious colour to our national goal of fighting the COVID 19 pandemic.
As if it’s a peremptory commentary on religious freedom in India is not enough, the USCIRF is now spreading misguided reports on the professional medical protocols followed to deal with spread of COVID19 in India. It must stop adding religious colour to our national goal of fighting the pandemic and distract from larger efforts. No segregation is being done in Civil hospitals on the basis of religion, as clarified by the Gujrat Government.
After reading this, I have a few questions in my mind, please answer me:
Aren’t we giving a chance to other countries, to put allegation against us?
Aren’t we responsible to fight discrimination on the basis of religion?
Should not we stop discriminating on the basis of caste and creed?
Forget about this virus, haven’t we been fighting on the basis of religion earlier? This is what we are, we have been fighting for years and while this virus is killing people, no matter their caste, creed or religion.
I am a neutral person, I neither understand politics nor interested in understanding it.
Let’s read what Head of ICMR, Dr Raman GangaKhedkar tried to tell us. I am trying to make you understand on the basis of logical and scientific factors. Not on the basis of religion and politics, let me explain what’s going on, so please read and understand:
Worry is relative phenomena if you ask me the background, the first case was on 27th January today we are exactly two and half months into the outbreak, you know the population density of our country, high level of migration that we have in our country, the proportion of people below the poverty line and staying in slums if you look at the world today, they are extremely worried how India is not showing so many cases.
If you compare our country with Italy, Spain, China at this point they were in the much worse stage. We are trying to flatten the curve. If you compare India with the US, they are economically much stronger than us.
Please understand the government has taken such a brave initiate. Our country is not as economically developed as the US, Europe, China yet more than 2.5 lac people have been tested.
The government immediately shut all businesses because life is more valuable than the economy and money.
Let’s forget about Muslims, aren’t we Hindus discriminate and abuse on the basis of caste, creed and culture? Intact state-wise basis within our own religion?
A Bengali brahmin girl fell in love with a Bihari brahmin boy. Now, read this carefully, this is a real-life story. They tried to convince their parents to earn their blessings and get married. Though the caste is same, religion is also the same now what was the issue :
They are from different states
The neighbouring States having cultural differences
Bihar was a part of Bengal once as Pakistan was a part of India but the same rivalry between the Bihari and Bengali is there.
So it became a continuous process, both the parties by that I mean the boy and the girl vs parents don’t come to the mutual track, they kept on fighting, arguing & convincing.
On the other side, the wind started to blow differently, family politics began, family members started to demean and disrespect each other. They try to break the bond by any possible means be it playing with emotions, character assassination, fabricating lies, mentioning names, body-shaming and so on.
So when both the families fight, many will sit and relax and enjoy the scene, some will take advantage out of it. People start commenting on the same way the US did.
This is how today our India is fighting, let not the rest of the world takes advantage out of it.
What’s wrong with Indians?
Is it so difficult to understand and obey the simple rules?
Team of doctors and health officials were pelted stones in different parts of our country.
Group of Nihangs, chopped off the hand of a police officer.
Recently, in Moradabad, a mob of around 150 people came and started throwing stones over team of doctors, attacked the ambulance and even attacked the cops, damaging the police car and ambulance.
However, 17 attackers have been arrested till now.
Salman Khan message to the nation-Do or Die
Salman Khan’s first interview for COVID-19 was published yesterday. He addressed the nation and raised his concerns.
You can watch the full video on YouTube:
He requested the citizens to stay at home, worship and pray at home.
Do you want to decrease the population of India starting with your own family?
He praised the doctors, bankers and all those who are working every day for us during this lockdown phase just to provide ease and support.
Let’s not fight, let’s not demean, time and again I am requesting the literates and educated mass of our society to get united and fight against Coronavirus, not with Communavirus or communa cancer.
In this cruel society, one can always be a victim, the society wants the girl to understand and keep their mouth shut to show regards when the in-laws fat-shame, pass brutal comments about features and looks, above all they won’t even spare the parents of the girl.
They love to criticize the girl in front of her husband and family members despite rectifying their own shortcomings.
Alia and Ranbir married each other, both started a new and happy life but Ranbir’s mother always kept on body-shaming Alia and used to curse both of them.
Alia is a beautiful and chubby girl, she is very fair with flawless skin but she is on the heavier side despite being so beautiful, one demerit of her life gives her in-laws a chance to despise her.
Alia often gets upset and this is nothing new, even before her marriage her mother-in-law made fun of her:
She kept on asking her son “What did you see in her”?
Ranbir always listened to his silently because whenever he tried to support his wife, it made things more difficult and the discussion turned into an argument.
Their behaviour was very irritating and it was difficult for Alia to accept this criticism. She got frustrated and started to get depressed.
She wanted to say to her mother-in-law that in-spite of hurting others she should invest time for her family’s betterment.
The society wants the girl to let go of all this criticism, teasing, mental harassment, demeaning statements but it’s actually not as easy:
It shakes the confidence
One gets demotivated
This leads to depression and it can be dangerous.
People don’t forget criticism or this kind of comments easily. According to experts, it takes years to let go of such comments.
Alia’s in-laws are a real example that Indian society can never come out of it. Though many families have learnt to respect and treat their daughter-in-law as their own daughters, the majority love to humiliate and offend.
Many girls and women commit suicide because of being body shamed and criticised by society, family and friends.
Every day her in-laws criticised her, by talking about her attributes, body, commenting on her parents.
Alia tried to forgive and forget as society demands from an ideal Indian wife and daughter-in-law. They kept on taunting her on everything possible. Even if Ranbir makes any mistake or fights with any family member they eventually blamed Alia.
Even after three years of marriage, nothing’s changed. During a festival, the entire family gathered to stay together where the mother & daughter kept taunting Alia, on the second day while they were commenting on her, she ultimately lost her temper and protested. Seeing her hitting back her in-laws were taken aback and they upped their vitriol. This let to a major verbal escalation and the entire family got dragged into it. Seeing her wife being flanked, Ranbir started supporting her wife. This led to a situation of Pandora’s box being opened up and every other issue started churning.
The end of this fight was not in sight. Ranbir, seeing this is never gonna end turned to his wife and parents to stop this. To this, Alia expressed her deep displeasure that she has been tolerating this pain for a long while now and again a fight ensued between Ranbir and Alia. Seeing the tides changing his mother and sister started taking Ranbir’s side, giving him the sense that this is going a different trajectory. Now, he was literally irritated and wanted this to stop at once, and in that heat slapped his wife.
Alia ran towards her room weeping profusely. She locked her room and kept on weeping. The agony, the pain, the disdain, the contempt, was overwhelming for her. She couldn’t take this anymore and thoughts started coming into her mind. It’s like all of those incidents were taking a rewind, converting her anger into revenge.
As usual, her alarm bell rang sharply at 6 a.m. waking her up from her thoughts, long before any family member does. She started her daily household chores and in the afternoon she went to the market to buy groceries as usual, the thought of revenge not yet faded.
She went straight to a store to buy insecticides tucked it deeply in her pants safely and went straight towards home.
She came back, her throat dry, she took a glass of water, her hands were shaking, went back to her room, looking constantly at the packet of insecticide.
Yesterday evening, Rosy stepped out of her house to buy grocery. Sarjapur road,Bangalore being one of the bustling roads, was silent, all the shops, supermarkets, restaurants, clubs and bars everything was closed.
Chills ran through her spine as she saw that few groceries stores were open but they had very limited products to sell. All of their selves which used to be arranged with all kind of food items and other products was empty.
The country has announced lockdown for 21 days, after walking around 3km she found a supermarket whose shutter was half-closed, she entered into the store and found that it was full of people who were shopping out of panic. She couldn’t manage to find a basket for herself even so she decided to buy only the necessary stuff.
She was not able to stock enough, she was worried, what if, she gets no chance to buy anything for the next 21 days, what if, the lockdown extends.
One girl passed by, she was carrying 2 baskets full of Doritos. Finally, she returned with the necessary stuff.
Next morning, she woke up, her company has already initiated work from home, now she felt relaxed that she has 2 hours more to sleep, no need to take bath, get ready and spend one hour on traffic to reach office.
At 10 a.m. she started to work, hours passed by and she kept on working, soon she realised after a few days that work from home is not relaxing at all. Earlier she had fixed working hours but now every day stretches upto 14-15 hours.
Every day when she returned from office, she could hear the tracks of music playing from the clubs but today they were all closed, all the lights of those happening places were switched off, the shops whose shutter were half-open was more frightening, it was the same she always watched in Hollywood movies which shows something is outside, someone can kill you anytime, monster or aliens have attached to a city.
But she never imagined that she could ever experience all of these in real life.
Rosy didn’t leave her home for the week, she ordered wheat, milk, water from the nearby shops. On the weekend, she got bored and decided to step out, the weather was good, a cool breeze was blowing, earlier the big apartments she never noticed because of the busy traffic she discovered that the flats have bigger balconies and beautifully designed.
She is new to the city, she has no friends here also she is not so familiar with the place. What helped her to remain connected to the world is only her phone. She used to spend the rest of the time watching Netflix or talking to her friends and family.
On Sunday, again she went for a walk, few people were outside of their house wearing masks, in her colony, the roads, as usual, was silent. Supermarkets now have to indicate social distancing by marking on the road. They have restricted time limits, as per the law.