हर लड़की की तरह नेहा के भी अपनी शादी और ससुराल को लेके बचपन से ही काफी सपने थे और आज पहली बार वो अपने ससुराल में कदम रख रही थी।
नेहा के पति ऋषि का भरा पूरा परिवार है 5 भाई बहन और बहुत से रिश्तेदार सब एक साथ रहते है वहीं नेहा मां पिता के प्यार में पली बढ़ी इकलौती संतान होने के नाते उसने कभी अपने घर पे इतने लोग देखे नहीं थे। उसने सोचा कि शायद उसे भाई बहन का भी प्यार मिल जाएगा।
ऋषि से नेहा ने अपने माता – पिता के इक्षा के विरुद्ध जा के शादी की थी उसकी मां ने बार बार समझाया था कि जिस घर को वो चुन रही है वहां जिम्मेदारी और रूढ़िवादी परंपराओं के अलावा कुछ नहीं है पर नेहा को समझ नई आया।
अपने ससुराल में घुसते ही सबने उसे बताया कि यहां घर के पुरुषों के सामने घूंघट ओढ़ कर चलना होता है और उनसे दूरी भी बना के रखना होता है। उसने कभी अपने घर में बचपन में अपने दादी को ऐसे घूंघट ओढ़े देखा था पर समय के साथ ये परंपरा चली गई थी।
ससुराल में आके उसे पता चला कि उसका कोई अपना कमरा तक नहीं है। पति से दूर हर रात दूसरी औरतों के साथ सो सो के परेशान होने लगी। उसे समझ में आने लगा कि उसकी मां कितनी दूरदर्शी और सही थी। बहू को ससुराल में घुसते ही मिलने लगा जिम्मेदारियों का ज्ञान पर एक नई बहू के सुख और सुभिधा का किसी ने नहीं सोचा।
कभी नेहा के घूंघट नहीं ओढ़ने पे पीठ पीछे बुराई होने लगी तो कभी कोई हर बात पे उसके पति से जा के शिकायत लगाने लगा। जिनके खुद के घर नहीं बसे और जो अपने ससुराल में पैर पटक के आयी वो सभी औरतें भी नेहा को अपनी अच्छाई के प्रमाण पत्र, ज्ञान और ताने देते नजर आए।
सबने बताया कि उसका ये ससुराल बहुत अच्छा है और ज्यादा पाबंदी भी नहीं पर नेहा तो शायद दूसरे ग्रह से है जहां के लोग इज्जत देते है, बहू कि सुख सूभिधा का ध्यान रखते है, जहां बहू को लक्ष्मी माना जाता है।
नेहा को यहां कई चेहरे दिखे, बिन पैदी के लोटे दिखे जो की एक जगह से सुनके दूसरी जगह लुढ़कते रहते, पंचायत करने वाले,अपनी सुभीधा देखने वाले, दूसरो पे आरोप लगाने वाले और सबसे बढ़ी बात पूरा घर एक दूसरे पे कीचड़ उछालने में लगा रहता और फिर उसी कीचड़ में एक साथ गले मिला के रहते थे।
इन सब के बीच बस एक चीज अच्छी थी नेहा के लिए वो है ऋषि।
उसे एक समझदार और अच्छा पति मिला था पर क्या नेहा इतनी सारी घर कि जिम्मेदारी उठा पाएगी?
क्या नेहा को चुपचाप सुनना चाहिए?
क्या ये कोलाहल वाला ससुराल नेहा के दांपत्य जीवन को प्रभावित करेगा?
Recently, I saw the ads of Four more shots, please! again. Last year, my friends did praise about the web-series but I assumed that it might be inspired by Kareena Kapoor’s Veerey Di Wedding and I decided to skip it because I wasn’t interested in watching any show based on feminism which shows how women have all rights to be badass.
This year, as we are in lockdown there is sufficient time to watch shows which varies by our taste.
So I started with Season 1 last Thursday night and finished the last episode of season 2 on Saturday afternoon.
I just loved the web-series. I tell you why?
Review in my way:
I am not going to write here the review for that you can just google it and find many articles and blogs on the same. Mine is a little twisted, I am not here to simply narrate the story but to make you understand why we must watch it. This web series is about four girls and the journey of their life. Why I liked the plot so much is because
All the actors have done justice to their acting.
Hats of to the leading ladies, all the four have justified their given roles and are a perfect fit.
Damini (Sayani Gupta), Umang (Bani J), Anjana (Kirti Kulhari) and Siddhi (Maanvi Gaagro) so the four girls met at a bar a few years back and bonded together.
The beautifully scripted storyline begins with someone’s success to others sorrow and sadness due to personal problems.
It actually shows the bond of friends and how important is it to have real friends in life.
Many of the times, we listen to others and do what pleases us because we trust a stranger more than others and we intentionally like to fall in the trap. Just like Anjana, who believed in someone.
Sidhi’s character shows how the family controls her since childhood and how she deals with body-shaming and finally starts to love herself.
In our society, we girls are grown and adapted the way our family and friends body-shame us, make fun of us. If we do something good, our own family doubt on our capabilities.
In my family, I am being fat-shamed and body-shamed since childhood. In many families, even in-laws mock and body-shame.
One of my cousins mocked at me for having readers and having fans on my page. Where this blog is even liked by Rangita Pritish Nandy and Maanvi Gagroo.
One of my knowns keeps abusing and threatening me when I give my views and opinions related to politics.
Though it was not required the way she gained the confidence, learned self-love and discovers her skills and abilities.
Bani J as Umang is a bisexual and falls in love with Samaira (Lisa Ray).
Umang’s character was actually interesting, it showed how she wanted to live her life with her own individuality. Being a Punjabi village girl she transformed herself, sustained and survived. Though her partner initially refused to admit their relationship later on everything goes well and they head towards marriage.
The one thing, that Umang said, at last, was not to choose a person who keeps career over you and try to mould someone according to own. I fully agree, there must be mutual concern and agreement. A relationship must always be equal in the sense of loving, adjusting, understanding, compromising and sacrificing. I can say that Bani was a real fit for the character.
Damini’s character is about a girl who is a journalist and founder of her company. She has a strong will, striking confidence, responsibility and maturity. Her, life shows different shades related to different topics be it office politics, anti-nationalism, righteousness. She is someone having a strong will-power, writing about and standing by the truth.
The story covers topics like misogyny, inequalities, trolling. It’s actually difficult for girls to survive even in Modern India where there are so many idiots in this world. Even on Facebook, so many people keep messaging, calling continuously unnecessarily from Facebook messenger.
Anjana is a lawyer and excellent at her work, however, her personal life is a total mess and she tries to fix out all the issues with her ex-husband. Trying to equally balance her life.
Being a successful lawyer, even she deals with the misogynistic behaviour of her boss. In my working career, even I have faced the same issue where higher authorities recommended my name for promotion based on my performance, but my immediate boss suggested a male colleague of mine because he could handle it better as he will not have to deal with home responsibilities.
Her character throws life about how difficult it is to raise a child, being a single mother, open relationship, infidelity, adultery.
I just loved her dress sense along with her makeover and lip-shades.
This is a complete entertainment during the lockdown. You can easily complete watching all the episode in just a days time.
Apart from the characters, you will love the editing, story-plot, sudden change of emotions in the storyline.
It’s a complete binge time for girls. You can rejuvenate your girl gangs memories while watching it and miss your friends.
Four more shots is bold, witty, fun to watch, delightful, glamourous, it gives you a message between all the glamour and shines of life.
Cinematography is very good.
While you are sitting at your homes you will be happy to virtually tour Istanbul, Jaipur, Goa and even you will love them to watch walking freely on streets and spending time in bars.
The web-series will remind you of FRIENDS as well. Just the coffee shop turned into a bar.
The series will make you miss your sleeping over at friends place, gossip and sharing.
Make you miss your friends and recollect the memories when they were with you during your wedding.
It will make you miss and encourage to plan a trip after things get normal.
There are two sides to every coin, on one side you find a happy relationship where the married couples are happy as they are able to spend time together.
As we are in the lockdown phase, many women are stuck to their houses, everyone doesn’t seem to have a simple and happy life. Some do survive in this toxic environment, where they are abused by family members and as everyone has not much now, some become victim and a few love to create problems.
While people are avoiding the virus, they are also facing challenges by staying at home. Children are giving a hard time as they need a lot of attention and care, they love to play and get some time with friends. The lockdown has forced the kids to stay at home. They either watch television the whole day, fight with siblings, play at home or other problems.
During office con calls, I hear the voices of my seniors whole time asking their kids to be silent.
The kids don’t understand why their parents are unable to give them time when they are at home.
Women are in a greater risk of becoming a victim and similar incidents have been reported from different countries.
Based on my learnings from different articles shared by News18, The New York times, psychiatrists, views of my lawyer friends, opinions of some other friends and family members of mine, I thought of writing and sharing some useful tips:
But before I share the tips let’s first understand what are the different forms of abuse:
Abuse is not just about power and control, people do it out of the purpose to create troubles in other’s lives as well. A few families member can take advantage of this situation to create troubles in several ways, let’s see how:
Not providing shelter, driving them away from their house. Say Corona or no corona effect, we have witnessed such events where family members forced their daughter-in-law to leave the house which led her to live a miserable life.
Emotional and verbal abusing: Now as there is not much work, people have time, and instead of building and maintaining a healthy relationship a few choose to abuse others.
Family politics has increased, people have more time to call each other, gossip and play with other’s emotions leading to domestic terrorism or intimate terrorism.
I was taken aback when I read that a few are not providing masks to the women, allow them to wash hands or use sanitizer. They send the women out to buy groceries thinking that she might get infected by the virus and die.
Can you believe that? These Covidiots, don’t understand that if she contracts the same, all in her contact will also gets the same.
Many counties across the world like the UK, Brazil, Spain, China, the US, Italy, France, Australia etc are reporting a panicking rise.
As the burden of work for women has increased, rather than raising the hand to help, the perpetrators are loving to enjoy the time relaxing.
According to a sociologist who studies abusive relationships, domestic violence goes up whenever families spend more time together, such as the Christmas and summer vacations, she said.
As entire India is in a lockdown state, Neha found herself all the time in the kitchen working all the time and trying to resolve the problems or fighting with her husband.
In another house, Fatima is holding her 3 years and 11 years old child, her husband began to beat her and locked her along with the children in a room. The kids and mother are starving for three days.
Somewhere in Delhi, Twinkle’s husband got frustrated as he is unable to meet his friends, drink alcohol and enjoy outside food and releases his frustration on his wife, the poor girl was bleeding and marks were all over her body. As his husband chocked her, her neck was in pain.
According to a Beijing-based NGO dedicated to combating violence against women says that there are cases reported of insecure husbands, who are keeping their wives under surveillance.
I feel the cases are rising in countries like America, China and the UK as the women are brave enough to take a stand. In India, whenever a woman wants to make a decision, she first thinks about society, parents and children. Calling the police will be the last option.
According to The Guardian, in Hubei province, domestic violence has tripled down.
If you are reading this, please imagine:
Staying in fear with a person yet limited options to move away
Getting body-shamed and fat-shamed
Deliberate poking by family members to create trouble.
Abusing and criticising
Controlling by every means
A home which is the safest place to many but a few are trapped inside with an abuser.
As News18 shared contact numbers, hereby I have just copied and pasted here.
Here are some phone numbers that can help you:
Help Age India: 1800-180-1253
Dignity Foundation: 080 2654 2229
If you suspect that a child might be facing or witnessing abuse at home, call the police at 100 or Childline at 1098.
It was almost 5, as Sanjali resumed the shoot hence all the crew members were busy so it gave Nillie a golden chance to escape from there without getting noticed by Raghav.
She called up a taxi and after settling down informed Raghav that she had to leave because she was not feeling well.
She reached the venue before time, she directly went to the washroom for a touch-up, while she’s is busy in touch up, Parth called..
Parth: Hello! I have reached, I am in another get-up, so to help you recognise me, I am wearing a black hat with a grey coat.
Don’t take my name, call me Grover, I don’t want media’s attention.
Nillie:(Giggled) okay boss! Got it!
She reached the place as directed, Parth was waiting for her with a glass of champagne. When he saw her coming towards her, he stood up from his chair to show chivalry and pull-out a chair for her.
Nillie: Thank you, baby!
Parth looked at her with amazement and smiled to see her all into the character.
Nillie gracefully glowed and made herself comfortable.
Parth: You are looking gorgeous. So how was your day?
Nillie: (smiled)Good! I was there at the shooting the whole day, I am coming directly from there.
Parth:Oh okay! So you enjoyed watching the shoot?
Nillie: Actually shooting started after lunch so I was unable to see much of her dance.
Parth: Why they started to shoot so late? It’s a spot where you need proper light from 2nd half, anyway, let’s talk about us.
Nillie told Parth about her past, where she came from, how she was unhappy in her marriage.
Nillie managed to portray herself as a self-made girl who struggled her way out from all the odd circumstances finally she has gathered courage.
Nillie is expert in gaining sympathy, she depicts herself as the fatality who has been violated and ignored even by her own family.
Meanwhile, during the discussion, Parth got a call from his manager as his meeting was fixed with some other director, he had to leave.
Parth:It was nice spending the evening with you, I wish I could spend some more time but I have to leave for now as I have other commitments, but wish to see you soon.
Well you send some of your dance videos to me, let me see what I can do for you.
Nillie: I understand, it’s difficult to get some free time from the busy schedule, I am honoured that you chose to spend some time with me.
I will be waiting for the next meeting. I will surely send you my videos.
Do you wonder what Parth liked in Nillie? Her calm and composed nature, beauty is not everything, beauty has no boundaries, but when beauty meets with brain success come on its own. This is why I adore Nillie, she is focused and knows what to talk and how to approach.
She can make her work done by anyone. Many of us lack such talent. Can we even call this a talent in the first place? You decide…